Marriage 101 (Do’s and Dont’s)

(reference: Letters To Karen)

Since sharing your hearts thru your lips is basic to marriage at its best, here are three do’s and don’ts that might help you in tending the bridge. 

  1. Do greet him with gladness when he first comes home. 
  2. Do take a few minutes at bedtime to ask each other, “What is the most happiest moment in your life today?”
  3. Do learn all you can about his work.

“Don’ts” are important also for the traffic of your heart thru your lips.  Here are three worth remembering.

  1. Don’t talk too much.  (Our sound may sound like a caw of a crow to the other person who waits to express himself.)
  2. Don’t try to impress him with how much you know.
  3. Don’t fail to still your lips when you should. (Repeated because it is important.)

Lord, fill my mouth with worthwhile stuff and nudge me when I’ve said enough!

Singapore Sling

Many years ago, my husband bought two Martini glasses with stainless steel ball on the stem for me on Valentine’s Day.  I did not know what to do with them except to display beautiful candies in them.  A year ago, I went out with a few Moms for “ladies night out”.  We had cocktails and I was hooked.  So, I began to learn how to make them at home.  One cocktail that I like to make is Singapore Sling.  I like it because it is made out of pineapple juice, and more importantly, simply because the name “Singapore Sling” is close to my hometown (Malaysia).  Recipe for Singapore Sling is posted here under the Desserts Page.

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8 Comments

Filed under Hip Drinks, Stream in the Hip Desert 新沙漠甘泉

8 responses to “Marriage 101 (Do’s and Dont’s)

  1. Kenny Mah

    Good advice, and I think we can apply to many other things as well, to our lovers and our friends and our family… I do talk too much most of the times, I know, so have been working on listening more. Usually, simply keeping quiet is the easiest first step toward achieving this. 🙂

  2. Kenny,

    I should have highlighted this more. This post is for wives; how women can be better halfs for their husbands.

    I never thought men have problems with talking too much. So Kenny, don’t worry. However, even if you do talk a lot, women will not find you a bore 🙂

  3. I totally agree about the talking too much part. I sometimes can be so very very self centered. I talk about myself with my family so much and sometime just don’t give enough time for them to share their day with me. Then at the end of the day I always thing “how come I was the last to know about things at home…?”

  4. With the world becoming more and more “equal”, the rules would apply as much to the husband as to the wife. I think men are as guilty as women when it comes to doing/not doing all of the above. Good lessons, tho, and I will remember them. 🙂

  5. Teckiee,

    When we are aware of our own weaknesses, we are one step towards maturity. That is a good thing! From the past postings on your blog, I can tell you have a good relationship with your family. I enjoyed your post on “bah chang”. Cooking with family is fun isn’t it? Keep it up and you will definitely reap the benefits in the near future.

    I think you hit a good point there, “last to know about things”. Statistically, wives are the last ones to find out that their husbands are having an affair.

    Lyrical Lemongrass,

    You are right about the equality between men and women. I was in the technical industry for over 10 years. I think one major difference between me and my husband is, I leave work at work. If I am stressed at work, I de-stressed by talking it out with colleagues over coffee or lunch break.

    I am glad that you find this post a good lesson. I have been married for over 13 years and I am still learning. Marriage is hard work.

    Yesterday night, I thought I’d practice what I learned. So, I asked my husband what was the happiest moment in his day. With a smile he said, “It was when I solved a big problem at work…” I will spare the details on how we spent the rest of our night.

  6. mrshbt, I am like you. When I leave my office, I leave my work behind. It’s the only way to maintain one’s sanity in the long run.

    Men…really are different, aren’t they? I can imagine them complaining about their wives in the same way too for not seeing their point of view. I’m sure there’s only so much they can talk about “feelings”….do you love me, dear?….how much do you love me?….hehe.

  7. Good for you, Lyrical Lemongrass, leaving work at work.

    By nature, North and South magnets attract to each other. Men and women are different. But that’s what make us attract to each other. Opposites attract. When I was younger, I often asked my husband, “Do you love me?” These days, what is important to me is “Do you love God?” I have found the secret to a happy marriage and that is “Love God First”.

  8. Leena

    I know I’ve always said that I prefer to email rather that blog…but how ’bout I make an exception this time. I also want the whole world to know that I am so proud of you (with your many talents and no, I’m not being paid to say all this) and how much I love you. Always thoughtful, kind and giving…even when I can be trying at times. To a fellow mum, I salute you for a fantastic job and I hope your kids will always remember that.

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